Just when I thought I was past the point of any serious set ups with women, my sister-in-law discovers someone who is probably the absolute perfect match... except for she's a woman, of course. So, when I go home for thanksgiving and every force on earth is trying to get us together, how exactly do I react?
"Sorry, I'm not dating right now."? I've been saying that forever and I'm not getting any younger.
"I'm just not the marrying type."? And dash all of my parents' hopes and dreams for more grandchildren?
"No, thanks, I like boys."? Yeah, way to ruin thanksgiving.
I'm probably going to be expected to go no at least one date with her. I can't believe I'm back in this spot. I swore I would never again go through the hell that is dating women... at least those who are strangers who are actually expecting me to want to fuck them.
I'm not at home very often. The only times I ever kinda want things to be generally like they always were is when I go home. I really wish this would go away, I wish people would leave me alone when it comes to setting me up, and I wish I could just be honest about it so these predicaments wouldn't come up in the first place.
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Then that is precisely what you need to tell them. I had similar experiences, and finally made it clear that if others wished to have engagements in which someone they thought I should meet was present, fine! But no set-ups; no double dates. If I wanted that to happen, I'd let them know. For now, God's plan for you is bachelorhood, and that's the truth.
If they cannot understand that, then their efforts have become about themselves, and not you. If that makes them wonder about your sexuality, then what is that to you? You can't do one thing about that, even if you were out (But I suspect, that like I did, you long for the resolution that transparency brings.).
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